How can i get over my family ?

I've been divorced almost a year in August. My ex Toni louise Harris kept me in the dark so I wouldn't get custody. We were livingtogether she kept my mail from me so I missed 3 court dates. We have been intimate since but now she won't talk to me. I was told by her family to be more responsible. My son even loves me more. He begged me a couple of times not to leave him. Crying and just balling. I never mention ed that he loves me more and choses me over her anytime. They told me I didn't care about him. Now they want me to never see him. I can't afford a lawyer to get visitation. I'm thinking of giving up so bad I wanna cry. I went over today she called the police. I just knocked on her door. She said she wanted to keep in contact when I went to the army. I don't know anymore wanna give up,should I? I guess I could always start over. New family and all people tell me to fight but she doesn't want me to see him again. She even called a girl I was seeing and told her we had sex. Then said she didn't want to be with me. Then a couple weeks ago she said she did. I even have video of me and my son playing having a great time. Should I give up